The Cake Guy

Love might not usually just happen with the guy you want to end up with. It might not usually work out for you with your fellow Luo man from Homabay, or your fellow member of the Seventh Day Adventist church. Sometimes you might end up getting stuck with someone that you will be arguing with in the house about lesson plan formats, or with conversations that revolve around which is the harder bar; Frozen chocolate or Law school exams! But whatever the case, just ensure that you choose whoever chooses you genuinely.
Three years ago, Zephaniah, might just have been the kind of man I thought I would have been praying and fasting for, for ten good days. He appeared when I least expected, maybe explains its Hebrew meaning (Hidden by God). I had saved him as Zeph on my phone. I mean we do the very most always to even find names for them, as if we are their mothers. Essentially, this might have been the most obvious instance of God instructing us to pray without ceasing and that even if we feel like we have found what we wanted, we should continue praying for further directions. I didn’t. I stopped, but I thanked God for bringing him my way. We met at a housewarming party. And later on, there I was, wishing that my house and his would be warmer than this particular one, but his cold heart won the race. I was attending Zeph’s wedding in Rodi-Homabay county.
Pastors have preached, and writers have written claiming that we don’t meet our soul mates in church because, on church days, everyone is parading as a holy saint. I didn’t meet Zeph in church atleast,so this was already counting as a plan itself.
“Care for a coffee on Wednesday evening?” Zeph had texted me a few days after the house warm party. Wait, this was a red flag already, I thought. Just the other day on Sunday, I had seen him post those long writings that SDA men post on their statuses with the burning flame  emblem for Adventists. I could relate to the sign-off of these quotes bearing the name Ellen white, and that’s how I came to learn that he was an Adventist. I responded and asked for sugarcane juice instead, because now all of a sudden, men from that faith who think they are rich are ordering for sugarcane juice and Dawa online.
I was really on the move to strike a bond with whoever came my way at that particular point. I showed up for the date, and the talking stage began. These were those talking stages that didn’t follow a particular order parsee. You are talking, and one time he has posted another lady, and you allow your mighty assumption power to rule over you, and make you think that that is his cousin. The sole responsibility is on you to set the next date. Ladies, kindly just wait for him to ask, because if he wanted to he could, but because he doesn’t want to, he has decided to plan his wedding on that Sunday that you want to meet him. Do you want to meet him on Sunday afternoon? That’s the time SDA wedding committee members meet to discuss the progress of an upcoming wedding.
Anyways, today is his wedding.One of our mutual friends is driving down to Homabay and I am idle as well.I have this new dress that I have been looking for an event to grace it with. So I decide to show up at Homabay Central SDA church that Sunday mid-morning.My friend is talking  to me about cost sharing fuel prices but I am not just in for his idea.I want to catch the bus going down that side.I want to pay my bus fare, because I  want to watch  this guy from a designated corner, lie with his vows on the pulpit the way he lied to me about keeping a relationship. A few minutes later, the MC is announcing that the groom’s family should move to the right and the bride’s family and friends to his left. I sit still, because I am not sure whom I am here for up to this point,but we are all  God’s children, so I sit still. Much doesn’t usually happen in the church because the major highlights are : the matron keeping an eye to ensure that the bridal team members don’t hug,one of the  bridal team ladies falling in wedge shoes,someone attempting to stop the wedding, a rare occurrence in SDA weddings nowadays or dealing with the anxiety about whether the officiating pastor will allow members of the bridal team to march because they have soaked their faces in make up and they have nail polish on.
Wedding receptions  usually seal the entire ceremony.I was seated in a group of people that I  had no idea who they were.They only started talking to me when the bridal  team started passing cake around.”Do you eat cake?” One  old man asked me. “No, I don’t.” I murmered as if to address him in a way that I didn’t want to appear rude.The cake was being passed from table to table. I turned to a table behind me as if to respond to a persistent tap on my shoulder which could not stop no matter how hard I tried to ignore it.He is staring deep into my eyes.He wants me to pass the plate of cake behind to them.He probably just doesn’t know how far I travelled to come have this piece of cake, and what this son of a luo woman has done to my heart.
“Hi, cant you speak?” I intentionally break the stare.He is pointing at the plate of cake that  I am holding dearly.He deliberately seems to be  appearing in all my photos as well.And When some choir guy who was seated next to me moves to go sit next to the newly weds,the guy moves next to my seat.He is  intentional:
“What is your name?
Can I have your number?”
And if you will, could you help me record this tiktok challenge?”
“Which challenge is that?”, I ask him.He has been  talking to me non stop like a Kisii man.
“The  song is called Arusi by Rubi Adventist Youth Ministry.” I consent to it, and it later on turns out to be  one  of the  the most sensational and invigorating content ever on my socials ,having pastors asking when they are officiating my wedding.The song’s lyrics  blast the wedding venue with lots of Kiswahili words that dont  make sense to Homabay people.
“Siku zote sala zetu zipate kibali,machoni pa Mungu,” When I turn to him and ask “Sala yako na nani?” Spoiling and calling for another take to record the video, he calmly whispers, “Lets focus on the now,the rest will handle itself.”
“Jua lipunge vivuli vikimbie,mimi wako wewe wangu,mifano borabora familia, yetu iwe mbingu ndogo, nakupenda, nakuenzi.”
This definitely pushes me to answer the questions that  the general public, and you as well might also would have loved to ask.And years later into settling in love,I  go way back and recall that this actually came to pass because I  involuntarily passed a plate of cake to the guy I  met in a wedding that  I  thought might not have made sense to my emotional sanity back then.But look, here is a hefty win-win. So guys, remember to show up for weddings of people who have wasted your time in the name of disillusioned talking stages.The love of your lives are seated there waiting for you to serve them cakes.

STAY SAFE ON KENYAN ROADS: UNDERSTANDING THE IMPORTANCE OF ROAD SAFETY AWARENESS

Introduction:

Kenyan roads can be dangerous, with a high number of road accidents recorded each year. While factors like poor infrastructure and inadequate law enforcement contribute to this problem, road safety awareness remains a critical component in reducing accidents on the roads. In this interactive blog, we will discuss the importance of road safety awareness, highlight some of the common causes of road accidents in Kenya, and offer practical tips for staying safe on the roads.

Types of road accidents

Road accidents can occur due to a variety of reasons and can have severe consequences. Here are some common types of road accidents:

Rear-end collisions: Rear-end collisions happen when a vehicle crashes into the back of another vehicle. These types of accidents are commonly caused by distracted driving, tailgating, or sudden braking.

Head-on collisions: Head-on collisions occur when two vehicles traveling in opposite directions collide with each other. These accidents are often caused by driver fatigue, impaired driving, or driving on the wrong side of the road.

Rollover accidents: Rollover accidents happen when a vehicle flips over onto its side or roof. These accidents are commonly caused by speeding or taking sharp turns too quickly.
Accidents could further be categorized as fatal where death of persons is involved, hit and run where one or both parties run away after the accident, and injury or non-injury indicating whether there are casualties occasioned by the accident.

Road Safety Awareness

Road safety awareness refers to the knowledge and skills that drivers, pedestrians, and other road users possess to keep themselves safe on the roads. It involves knowing the rules of the road, understanding the risks associated with driving, and being aware of other road users’ behavior. In Kenya, road safety awareness campaigns are regularly conducted by the government and other stakeholders to educate road users on safe road usage. These campaigns aim to reduce the number of road accidents by promoting safe driving habits and encouraging road users to be responsible and vigilant on the roads.

Common Causes of Road Accidents in Kenya

Reckless driving: This refers to behaviors such as speeding, driving while using your phone and overtaking dangerously.

Poor infrastructure: Many Kenyan roads are poorly maintained, with potholes and inadequate road markings contributing to accidents.

Lack of traffic law enforcement: The lack of adequate enforcement of traffic laws in Kenya has contributed significantly to the high number of road accidents.

Tips for Staying Safe on Kenyan Roads

Staying safe on Kenyan roads requires a combination of defensive driving skills and knowledge of the rules of the road. Here are some tips to help you stay safe:

Observe traffic rules: Always obey traffic rules, including speed limits, traffic signals, and road signs.

Wear a seatbelt: Always wear a seatbelt when driving or riding in a vehicle to ensure you stay put, and steady in case of an accident.

Be visible: If walking or cycling on the road, wear bright or reflective clothing to make yourself more visible to other road users.
Characteristics of Road Transport Systems of Kenya
Kenya’s road transport system is a vital component of the country’s economy and infrastructure as it spearheads major development all across the country and the world as well. It provides an essential means of connecting different regions of the country and supporting the movement of people and goods. Here are some characteristics of the road transport system in Kenya:

Road network: Kenya has a well-developed road network covering over 160,000 kilometers, with around 15% of it being paved. The network is managed by various government agencies, including the Kenya National Highways Authority (KeNHA) and the Kenya Rural Roads Authority (KeRRA).

Public transportation: Public transportation in Kenya is dominated by matatus, which are privately owned minivans that operate on fixed routes. Matatus are a popular and affordable mode of transport for many Kenyans, although they are often criticized for being unsafe and unregulated. The safety concerns surrounding them are in most instances associated with their drivers’ conduct on the roads.

Safety concerns: Kenya has one of the highest rates of road accidents in the world. The road transport in Kenya is characterized by bad roads especially in rural areas, poorly maintained vehicles, ill-trained and inconsiderate road users and corruption. All these factors increase the vulnerability of road users to accidents.

The government and various organizations are working to improve road safety through measures such as increased enforcement of traffic laws, education campaigns, and road infrastructure improvements.

In conclusion, road safety awareness is a critical component in reducing the number of road accidents in Kenya. By understanding the risks associated with driving, observing traffic rules, and practicing defensive driving, we can all play a part in ensuring that our roads are safe for everyone and all the systems put in place can be trusted by road users. Remember, road safety starts with you.

For more information on the road transport system in Kenya, you can visit the following links:
Kenya National Highways Authority: https://www.kenha.co.ke/

Kenya Rural Roads Authority: https://www.kerra.go.ke/

Matatu Owners Association: https://matatu.co.ke/

Kenya Transport Association: https://www.kta.co.ke/
National Transport and Safety Authority: https://ntsa.go.ke/
National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) – https://www.nhtsa.gov/
Injuries
Insurance Institute for Highway Safety (IIHS) – https://www.iihs.org/

AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety – https://www.aaafoundation.org/

Daniel Muriuki Njeru (22-0511)
Contact: 0703643375

The Social Media Effect: How Platforms are Shaping University Life for Students

Social media has become an integral part of modern life. It has revolutionized the way people communicate, interact, and even learn. The impact of social media on education among university students is a topic that has been extensively researched, and the results have been both positive and negative.
On the positive side, social media has had a significant impact on the way university students learn. One of the most significant benefits of social media is that it has made education more accessible. University students can now access learning materials online, interact with their professors and peers, and participate in online discussions. Social media platforms such as Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn provide students with a platform to connect with industry experts, mentors, and potential employers. They can also learn about new job opportunities and trends in their field of study.

Social media and learning
Social media has also made learning more engaging and interactive. Many universities now use social media platforms to create online learning communities where students can share ideas, collaborate on projects, and provide feedback to each other. Social media tools such as blogs, podcasts, and videos are also being used to create more engaging and dynamic learning experiences.

Tool of communication
Another significant benefit of social media is that it has improved communication among students and between students and their professors. Students can now reach out to their professors more easily, and professors can provide feedback and support to their students more efficiently. Social media platforms have also made it easier for students to connect with their peers and form study groups. This has helped to foster a sense of community and collaboration among university students.
Lead distraction
On the negative side, social media has also had some adverse effects on education among university students. One of the most significant negative impacts is that social media can be a distraction. Students can easily get sidetracked by social media notifications and spend more time on social media platforms than on their studies. This can lead to poor academic performance and lower grades.
Academic misconducts
Another negative impact of social media on education is that it can promote plagiarism and academic dishonesty. Social media platforms make it easy for students to access and copy other people’s work, making it difficult for professors to detect plagiarism. This can compromise the integrity of the education system and devalue the hard work of honest students.

Mental health concern
Social media can also have a negative impact on mental health among university students. The pressure to maintain a social media presence and the fear of missing out (FOMO) can lead to anxiety, stress, and depression. This can affect academic performance and the overall well-being of university students.

In conclusion, social media has had a significant impact on education among university students. While the impact has been both positive and negative, it is clear that social media has become an integral part of modern education. The key to maximizing the positive impact of social media on education is to use it in a responsible and constructive manner. Universities and professors should encourage students to use social media platforms for learning and collaboration while discouraging the use of social media as a distraction or a tool for academic dishonesty. Students should also be encouraged to take breaks from social media and prioritize their mental health and well-being. By using social media responsibly, university students can reap the benefits of this powerful tool and achieve academic success in the end result of university learning.

For more information on the impact of social media on university students, you can visit the following links:

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1877042814011566
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6361886/
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/337504881_Social_Media_Use_and_Academic_Performance_of_Students_in_University_of_Nairobi_Kenya
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/322986416_The_Impact_of_Social_Media_on_Students_in_Higher_Education_A_Case_Study_of_Kenyatta_University
https://victormatara.com/social-media-and-its-impact-on-students-in-kenya/

Written by Eunice Akinyi Onyango

22-0770

Lucky-Summer

He asked me to meet him in a pub. I was desperate,  I really needed this job,  I wouldn’t  even think twice about meeting points. He was a middle aged man,  with a potbelly. Dark and sitted with pride next to him.
‘Nyarmama,  bed piny, bed piny! “
I had several mixed signals.He had said he was the Director of Studies,a great man of  respect because DOS drives the school.He had all the powers to secure me a teaching position in his school.
I felt so lucky to be meeting this man on that sunny Friday afternoon
in  Lucky Summer.

Getting to Lucky summer depends on your interest to go there.First forward, some little Luo will help you through and through because right inside the small matatus from Allsops, you will by chance sit next to two women who have come from Nairobi town to collect fish in large numbers.They would be speaking Dholuo in all kind of mannerism.Luo in actual sense is not a polite language, someone is usually either bragging, or confronting the other for scratching the back of their mercedes in a heavy,slow and resonance tone in the matatu.
”We are on a mid-term break right now,  but once we get back on session,  I’ll definitely  get back to you”.
He assured me with with his eyes glued on the pub’s screen.
I nodded and asked to leave because  I was meeting another teacher right in front of Lucky-Summer SDA church.  He had promised me,  on LinkedIn to help me secure an internship position in his school. When I got there,  I couldn’t trace him,  I didn’t  have his number,  we had all along been talking  on LinkedIn,  it showed that he was active 45 minutes ago. I stood there,  in the hot sun,  bought street  ice worth twenty shillings, as I waited just in case he showed up.
Being a Friday  afternoon,  I really needed to rush back home and iron clothes for the Sabbath. I didn’t  want to stay out late.  It had been an hour already. Children started streaming into the church,  maybe to  practice for their songs. They waved and giggled at  me. Some whispered 
‘happy sabbath’
Some asked ‘are you here to see Harry? ‘
I told them,  ‘happy  day,  and asked,  who’s Harry? ‘
“He is one of the choir members. He  is always in church even on Sundays”.  Some older ones said.
“Yes  he doesn’t have a girlfriend.”
I asked them “Is he a teacher ?”
They said,  “no he builds roads.”
And yet another said, “an engineer like my dad”. An older boy said,  “he went to my high school. “
And I quickly  asked,  “where’s your village”?
‘”Sori. “
“I asked where  your village is for goodness sake. “
“And I said Sori for a better sake. “
Everyone  who comes from Migori know where Sori is.
Well Migori people,  can we agree to change how we pronounce the name of this village to So-ra-i ?
“Where  do you go to school?
“Kanga School.”
“Ah!,ok.”
And he looked at me and said ”look who is here”
A tall well built,dark man walked towards us.He was relatively handsome.He smiled and said, ‘Happy Sabbath’with a deep voice citting across the edge.The exact  same voice of SDA Bass members who you  will never find with one girlfriend.
We all  said ‘Happy day’.
“Hi Salome, karibu sana.”
Then he turned to the children and told them
“This is your music teacher  today. “
“I have heard a lot about you from the church elders here. Come on in.The children also seem excited to have bonded  with you
I hope you enjoy your song practice  session this evening.”
I wasn’t Salome, at least  for the mere records,  I wasn’t here for anything church related,  I was looking for a job. I am a teacher,  I teach children, children of the world, not children of the church,  I barely remember any memory verse,  the only chorus I remembered  was  I” am happy today, So happy,  in Jesus name I am happy… “
Harry on the  other side,  was actually  single. The children had said.  He was from kanga school,  and an engineer to be precise.
Guys,I sang.I marched. I recited memory verses,  and ended up getting this job,  but now in a church and not a school.
Two months later, I was meeting Harry at a church related  event. The church teenagers from Karen were having their annual career talk in church. I had not been invited as a speaker,  I had taken my teens .Children who show up for our church career talks don’t  want to hear from teachers during their career talks.  They want to hear from three people. Doctors,  lawyers and engineers.  So that explains why Harry was among the panelists in church that day.

I sat and asked the children to take notes.After the talk,  we had a quick chat with Harry. He seemed excited to have seen me. He complimented my three year old ago dress. He asked if we could meet up for coffee later in the evening.I was definitely  up for this. I had even forgotten how inconsistent  nigga had gotten since we met two months ago.
He was the type who took eight hours to respond to  WhatsApp messages.Well,  he wouldn’t post or view statuses  but he would always be online,  with my text unresponded to.
I added a text to the unresponded to text and would ask again,
“Umekula? “I would later on recall that engineers from Kanga school don’t  understand  Kiswahili, but would still leave the text there,  lest he decide to use Google translate  to understand  my question.
Two hours later, the text would not have  been responded to and I would add another text  to the unread text.
‘Wanted to know if you had lunch’
Ah,  and finally when I remembered  this message is not being responded to because  I missed out on the first pronoun I,  I’d add another text,  now grammatically  correct.
‘did you have lunch? ‘
This would later on be answered at 7:30pm with
‘Yes I did. On my way home ‘.
Yaani! My heart would be silently  wailing,  wishing to question ego
and ask ‘who do you think you are? “
But then,  I would text back and say
‘Waah,  si unakuanga busy!’.

Now this evening,  I should have already read the vibe,  but I didn’t.
I chose the restaurant  myself,  I was even told to wear my long  white dress and green sandals,just to look like a pathfinder. I showed up five minutes before seven because  engineers are always busy.
I sat and waited. I texted my friend
‘Out for dinner with Harry’
She responded promptly and said.
‘No you ain’t.
So I quickly  call her and she says that she is kidding,  and that is actually  oblivious  of my plan and Harry.
Thirty minutes later, he hadn’t showed up.
I check WhatsApp  and see that he’s  actually  online.
I ask “uko”?
How fast I forget.
He doesn’t respond till ten minutes later and says.
‘I am home,  I can’t make it because  I have a headache ‘
So because  I am so livid now,  I dial his number,  because  I definitely  want to hear this vague explanation from his own mouth. 
He hangs  up in the first ring,  and I get a message in caps.
‘KINDLY TEXT’. I love the boldness.
So I quickly  make my way out. The waitress is following me hastily calling me madam,  I tell her to go call her teacher madam.
So I go home  and vow to myself,  never to call or talk to him whatsoever.I delete his number and a few of his friends’,  and convinces  myself  that I  am actually  over him.

Two weeks later, on a lazy Sunday afternoon after our church choir master telling me to watch how to sing tenor voice on YouTube because I wasn’t cooperating during the practice, I am in bed on Pinterest,  saving photos of dresses I don’t know where I would ever get them, with the anger that my Ruiru based tailor would never make such a dress as well.
I get an email from my my friend who had hinted that Harry wouldnt show up for the date, but I didn’t  listen to her.
‘Unajua leo ni birthday  ya Harry? ‘
‘Hapana,  na mbona unanitumia email? ‘
‘Juu ni serious case yenye siwezi tuma kwa WhatsApp ‘
Aii,  I get paranoid and sit up.

Three days ago,  I had passed by Lucky summer to see a friend and because  I knew Harry lived there, I had recovered  his number, called him and told him that I was in his hood.
He asked me to drop by and say hi.I felt like a Queen. I mean,  I was his first priority ,he wanted to see me.
How dumb can a girl get?
So he basically texted me the apartment name,  and house number. When I got there, I found his door slightly  open.He was sitted in his house office corner ,in a meeting with his colleagues from Cambodia. I waited by the  door for 15 minutes till  he was done. We sat there staring at each other,  with his screen blasting  those Luo songs, where Johny Junior and Prince Inda says that girls are angels and that love was planned in heaven .
Those songs with Luo lyrics like ‘Kata kochano wuoth,  ochalo malaika’
I mean luo men,  could do the worst with your heart and mental  state and sing you away into walking like an angel.
He served me soya milk,  and thanked me for passing by. He then asked me to just follow the path way up, like I’d come,  and let him know once I was home.

Huh!  So my friend works with a branding  company. One good thing with SDAs in the  city, they will always be promoting each other.  A lady texted her and asked ‘Hi Ashley, I want portraits of these two photos. I will send them to your WhatsApp,  but because I don’t want you to use them inappropriately,  I will cover them with emojis till I’m  there, then I will give you a go ahead.Also,  please  be ready to work on them with urgency  because  the party is this afternoon. ‘
Once the photos were sent, Ashley couldn’t  hold it as well.
She now called me and said.
“I know Harry’s skin tone,  I know all his watches,  I know his brown khaki pants,  and I know the number of hair strands on his chin.
He has been my friend for a very long time.
This is him.
I’m portraiting his photo for another girl,  as his birthday  gift.
The girl has said that their wedding is in four months time in Lucky Summer SDA church,  in fact she has said that she hasn’t yet gotten one more bride’s  maid,  are you willing to be? “.
This  clearly  wasn’t the  luckiest of my summer.

ONCE BITTEN…

I met her at the church gate on a Sunday morning. It was 6:30 am. Didn’t she know that this was an SDA church and that the members of the youth choir had not been showing up for choir for the past three weeks, despite the pastor’s major appeal every other Sabbath at noon? The youths had been heard saying that they would rather stay at home and make TikTok challenges by the Tanzanian choirs. I had been contemplating leaving the Adventist Youth and joining the Women’s ministry or the Children’s ministry for good, but my age dragged me by default. My interest in smiling with children had been seen by the senior church management and I had been nominated as the children’s ministry trip advisor. Yes, in SDA children go for trips with a set of uniforms. It’s usually either green and white, or navy blue and white, depending on the age, and in instances where the uniform has been used the previous day, you will see them with purple t-shirts written Seventh Day Adventist Church-Kanyikela. I was here to prepare the children for a trip to Embu.

She seemed not to have slept the whole night. Her natural hair had the eco-styling gel drying up, and now it was all white. Her face was sore. She seemed really like someone who didn’t have an idea that our church youth choir wasn’t meeting up. She was wearing a pink peplum dress. With an old faded brown down her shoulder.

“Hi, can I help you?”

“Yes please”. She gave me a pale look. How I wished that the church kitchen door was open so I could serve her hot soya.

“Are you here for the choir practice?”

“Which choir practice? “She raised her brows.

” Youth choir of course”. I gave a look as if to ask why she did not know the order of any Adventist church on a Sunday morning

“Oh, I am not a member of this church.

I come from Nyamira; I sing for the church choir there.”

“And what brought you here? “I ask curiously.

“I am looking for Steve Ogolla. He works here in Nairobi, and this is his church.”

Wow. This was now on another level.

“So how much did you use from Nyamira to here?

“Uhm., she mutters like someone who had been given a ride by the lorry drivers from Sirare.

“My parents paid for the fare.”

“Ok, and why are you looking for Steve?”

“We have been in a long-distance relationship for 6 months now. I was at his place last month, and I have tried tracking him from there but I was told that he moved houses.

I have also missed my periods.”

Well, I look sideways to see if Steve is on his way to church because he is not ready for any verbal fight with a lady from Nyamira who has not eaten a banana in the morning. Essentially, he should be here because he is the church bus driver.

So, I look at her and ask a question which was to kind of help her understand this whole issue.

“Which high school did Steve attend?”

“A school in Nyanza, you Nairobi girls wouldn’t know it!”

“Thurdibuoro?” I giggle.

“So, you know some schools in Nyanza?”

“I read about it online.”

“Oh, ok.”

“Which was Steve’s?”

KANGA SCHOOL!

Huh! My favourite boys have done that thing again.

“I don’t know that school, I have never heard about it before.

Excuse me!

I walk into the church and close the gate behind me.”

MR. T

He is not your typical Valentine’s date. He has an appointment with the dentist. Same reason I am in the hospital on a Valentine’s Day afternoon. I am not in pain, seems like he is easy as well. Both our appointment time has delayed, he was to go in at noon, then I go at half past one, but he only starts being handled on my scheduled appointment time, for the next one hour.
Mr T is a tall, dark guy. (I am not sure about him being handsome). He is in a suit on a Monday afternoon. A Black Suit. He looks 28 or 30. He is seated at the very far edge of the waiting bay seats with a book stretched far away from his face. The hospital corridors, at this side of the dentist room is not as busy. Only 6 people waiting.
The nurse then calls,
“T!”
He raises his head and walks briskly into the dentist’s room. What kind of a name is T? Neither Tony nor Tom, just T.
When I see T again, its 2:30 pm. He is done with the dentist. I go in psychologically prepared for an hour-long assessment, which even goes on for 2 minutes long.
T has not left the hospital yet. For me, I am yet to start processing payments from the insurance. 40 minutes straight into this.
“35,000Ksh, where is your card? “The cashier is conversing with T, who is right under her nose, but she squeaks as if to address the entire waiting bay”
“What card?” T asks.
We exchange looks, before one lady shouts as if to address T from the back.
“Insurance or NHIF, whichever!”
T shakes his head and asks for the hospital account number.
He is been too engrossed in his book to notice anyone seated next to him. He also does not seem to be in a hurry. I have seen him since 1; 25pm.Its 4;30Pm, but he doesn’t seem to be leaving any time soon.
The cashier calls me, and points to the hospital’s account number. She says,
“15,000Ksh”
For a moment, I feel like telling her that I am not T.I hand her my card and wait for her to bill.
I sit there momentarily, because today, people seem not to leave the hospital immediately. Plus, its Valentine’s Day, and I don’t have a date, its 5Pm already.
T picks a call.
“I am just across the court”.
Sounds like an answer to where are you? He slides the phone back into his pocket and continues reading. When I receive a call from Rennie, one of my friends who is a nurse at the hospital, I take an elevator to ground floor from first floor.
Hanging out with Rennie doesn’t last long. I get a call from the dental cashier that my payment from the insurance is not reflecting in the hospital system. It’s her fault. Seems like her Valentines has stood her up, or that she can’t just figure how on earth she is working today. She is too bitter.
“Seeing you again?”
T has this deep voice. The typical voice that SDA bass members own. You know for bass members, they already know that they can just do without that mic, but they have always maximized it, that we almost fail to hear tenor.
I nod, because what is he still doing at the hospital at 7Pm? He is weird. Doesn’t he have a valentine’s date, or ok, coffee or dinner?
“Are you not leaving, or you work here?”
I shouldn’t have asked about working, because he has been warming the seat since 1;25Pm.
“I am actually on my way out, Shall we?”
Shall we what?
Get you an insurance card, or make you understand that people don’t sit at the waiting bays the entire Valentine’s Day, and complete a 467 paged novel?I feel like pasting

the questions on his forehead.I tell him that I am good, and that I also know my way out.“Explains why you spent your whole Valentine’s Day in the hospital alone in black jeans.” He retorts.I get attracted to his insolent boldness. I turn and smile at him. He lowers his mask and winks.“Shall we?”Shall we what?” I ask gently.“Walk down to Newlife SDA church. Its just across the road. I have choir practice”Wow, SDA men, practicing hymns at 8PM on a Valentine’s night.“Do I get soya?”“Wait, you take soya?”He is almost holding himself back from saying Happy Monday, because it’s not Sabbath. He drives to Prestige Mall, and gets me a bunch of 50 petals of rose flowers and a new book that I have not read before, which perfectly suits my wavering personality now. The book is called;Why you act the way you act by Tim Lahaye.“Are you Tim?” I finally ask“No, I am Theodore”Now what name is that?Can never be me!

CHIEF CATERESS

How hard does it get when one is trying not to fall in love? It seems like a whole sort of a sport since most of us seem never to hack it right. Not even myself during the 100th trial.
Yesterday might have been one of my worst days ever. Well at least I am thanking God that I am alive, and what almost attempted to kill me was nothing serious. Just misplaced feelings.
Undeserved effort
Wrong emotional outlet.!
I was meeting Denis’s face to face for the very first time, and I decided to initiate the conversation. You see, I am a very good conversationalist, and that is something that I can’t really hide. I had wanted to know Denis more. Its long since I got close to just anyone, and a guy in this situation.
“Happy birthday Denis!” I declared exuberantly as I headed towards his directions.
Denis had been surrounded by six more guys. They wore such ecstatic faces and had emblem of honor burning inside them. The smiles on faces alluded a very bright Sabbath afternoon. They definitely to me, seemed like a members of an acapella group, from a church in town. Normally, members of such acapellas, are always yearning for a girl to approach them, as they deliberate on close tactics of breaking her heart.
On this particular Sabbath, I had one of my Africa themed dresses on. One that I had bought because of fear of Missing out. Let in not be said, that “How comes, you don’t know that girl from Range SDA who wears short skirts and dresses?”
I was confident, at least they were going to listen to me. One problem though, I was guilty within, I still had not joined any singing group, as promised after my last heartbreak.Lest they asked me to bless them with a chorus!
Why is Denis Standing here with them?
Is Denis part of this choir?
Later on, I would remember Owen telling me that Denis had loved singing since his campus days.
Denis stared at me for a moment before he blurted:
“How did you know that it’s my birthday?”
I definitely had stocked my stalking skills. This time round I wished I could see a blue jay and a cardinal fly by, but nothing was happening.
I looked at him, grinning. He smiled.
At least you could have appreciated that I wished you a happy birthday. I said to myself.
“I just saw that pop in your timeline”
I said to break the awkward silence that was ensuing, and the stares that I was getting from these guys who I now thought I should have said hi to to know who came from South Nyanza and was likely to act up like the deputy pastor and chief chorister.
Since the wave of Covid-19, all churches resorted to go online, and so did our church which I had just started attending. With time, I was going to get to know most of the members. Most of the interactions, including youth meetings happened online. At least the youths were relieved, since they were not expected to carry and arrange chairs when the sun set.
Denis assumed the immediate rank after the youth leader and had been delegated with the duty of making new members feel at church. He made me loathe chivalry as much, up to date. He was the kind who often texted to ask how I was, often left me a message wishing me a good day. At least he was not the kind who filled my inbox with Bible verses every day.
He was not the typical SDA guy, who sent every other link of a song released by Msanii Singing group, or Gifted Ministers, or Gracious Family (Talking about choirs that release songs, when you decide to close your eyes, and breathe in for a second)
The world needs someone they can admire from a distance; from a very far distance.”
― Michael Bassey Johnson
We grew fond. We talked after every minute, and I felt like our souls were getting to connect.
I even started befriending ladies who have had their weddings before, because mine seemed not to be far away. He often retaliated that he does not like Soya, and when I asked him where he came from, and he said Bondo, then I got the answer to my long trail of questions, Like, where did he grow up?
Did he have a grandmother who grounded soya powder herself on Friday as the sun set
Did he have a grandfather who summoned them before him every other Sabbath preparation to ask them to show him, their ironed clothes?
It was all fun as we talked on phone, he was the exact epitome of a gallant man.
I remember one time when I was praying to God for answering my prayers, giving me a man, I had wished to have.
And I could now feel the ardent urge God had to break heavens, to shout down to me the response of the prayer that I rendered to him daily. I felt His urge to let me know that I should find something else to do maybe reconcile with other SDA men, who had promised me heaven but were now singing in the same choir with their wives.
All along, he was one sweet guy, and as time went on. We spent most of our nights talking on phone and laughing out loudly. Maybe my neighbors thought I was running mad, perhaps in the name of love.
Slowly by slowly we started falling for each other’s vibe. We talked about our childhood and joked about our plans that never really came to actualize. He had grown into a doctor now, yet he had dreamt all his life about becoming a renown pilot. I had wanted to be a teacher, and I still was one, prolly growing into a better and happier one.
Today, being a Sabbath, was also Denis’ 27th birthday, and I had planned to throw a surprise birthday party for him at The Elysian Resort (Such a tall order, you know). As I approached him after the sermon to try talk him to head to Runda that afternoon, I knew it would ease my work, he would choose me forever.
“So, guys, this is Wendy, a very good friend of mine. Denis said.
“Good to see you, Wendy. “They all muttered.
“Wendy, all these are members of my wedding committee, and Daisy there, is the bride, (My wife to be)”
Wow, it’s your birthday Denis. I thought to myself. But what was I to do anyway? I volunteered to be the chief cateress in a wedding of a guy I thought was growing to love me, and maybe would eventually marry me. (Let us all laugh at me).

DEAR SDA EX

It has been exactly 5 months since you made peace with the fact that I can’t just actually sing in the choir, style my natural hair, roll brown chapattis, and sit patiently by the fireside waiting for beans to boil on a Friday evening, for the potluck on Sabbath. Gone are the long-lost memories that we had, on the days when we could go with books to the park for a book date, because you knew I loved books, and you wanted to please me, the days when you asked to travel to the city for a musical concert, to meet ladies from Lavington SDA church and to the days that you actually lied that you are not committed in any other relationship.
So, for today, I know why you preferred ladies from Lavington SDA to me who stays at home to follow Sabbath services on YouTube. I never had time to style my natural hair. My skater skirts plug often let me down, well, I didn’t have time to travel to Lavington every evening after work for choir practice, because Lavington and Kiambu are literally two worlds apart. Thank God for my friend Josiah who always motivated me to read the lesson with him every single day of the week, because he is those Sabbath school lesson teachers who really ensure that they pass Wednesday when discussing the lesson, and close with a hymn right on time.
I so love the temerity that you upheld when we dated. The audacity to make me trust that you actually never had another girl in your life. Sad that things have become so easy in Nairobi city. If you are a girl dating a Luo man precisely from South Nyanza, from one SDA chaplained boys’ high school, then you actually don’t have trouble knowing who, what, where, when everything happens in their lives. Its way easy.
Simple steps for you therein:
Go to your Facebook, type Kanga School (or whichever SDA school that you know, because KANGA SCHOOL IS KANGA SCHOOL) and wait for the results.
You will actually see a trail of guys in your timeline that you know, who appears to know him.
You will also see a few girls from your village, but who have settled in the city, and attend Lavington SDA church. (That is where you will now start fidgeting with your phone keyboard.)
Get hold of one guy (just one) and ask,
“Do you know Morgan?”
Of course, they will go mum for seconds and blast you with:
“Is he asking you out?”
Many are the times you have tried to be creative and stammered in between the conversation.
“Uhm, not really! We just met in some wedding, and he said Hi!”
“Oh! That is nice. He is a good person.!”
They will always wish you a great evening, because they are doctors and they want to do their evening ward rounds.
Few weeks later, will find you dialing their number again, this time round, with an intense urge to want to know if he is actually seeing someone else, because he has suddenly become an absentee partner.
This time round your resource person will humbly say:
“You mean you were not home when he came with Lynne for the church fundraise?”
He walks with Lynne everywhere like she is his twin. This should have given you a hint long time ago.”
So, you keep quiet for some time, because you rarely go home, and can’t even remember the last event you ever attended at Owich SDA Church in Central Kanyamkago.

On the boil though are alma maters from St Joseph’s Rapogi, though still in larger South Nyanza living in the city. If you are the kind of lady who attends the catholic church, and has come across a jasouth from this school, refer to notes given to SDA ladies above. Lucky if you are in this city and we don’t know your high school denomination (Those from Maranda and Homabay High School).

Things actually went so fast yet so slow.
But this is the only heartache that trails me from our whole dating period.
Long before I knew it, you had gone from Saving my number on your phone as ‘Sunshine’ to my two official names (Diana Aluoch), then to my first name, Diana, then Boom! Diana Oremo (My grandfather’s one and only name). Trust me you the pain disappeared and I remained laughing and wondering what wrong my grandfather did to get dragged into all these, because aiiiiiiii, my father also has a second name and you could still have saved my contact as Diana Agola.Hits hard you know!

Faintly my heart will sing SDA Hymnal (99) (God will take care of You)

Be not dismayed whate’er betide, God will take care of you;
Beneath His wings
Of love abide,

God will take care of you.
God will take care of you,
Through every day:o’er the way;
He will take care of you;
God will take care of you.

Perfect, whole and complete

Life after engagement  always appear beautiful. It is what we all expect. Its all we pray for,  and all we always wish for.
The engagement  ring is something precious  that stick with us,and shimmer on our fingers,oblivious  of what is going on around us.For the records,  the promise ring might just be the most hyped set of euphoria that one might have encountered first maybe.
A fortnight before my engagement  night,  I asked him to do what other guys do to their ladies.
Well this is something I’d just seen on Instagram  (only men would understand the pressure they have to go through before claiming a girl).
So there’s a ring outside here called a promise ring,  and it plays almost the same role as the engagement ring,  just that this one is given from one person to another in a romantic relationship to signify their fidelity and commitment. At its most essential, giving a promise ring symbolizes one partner’s devotion to the relationship, and accepting the ring does so for the recipient.
I asked for it,because I saw he needed to be woken up from sleep,  and he said we’d  organize for that particular  evening.
I mean  you know, men who have to be occasionally  reminded on what to do, where and when?

Saying yes, when asked if you’ll marry them that pretty evening or  during a peaceful night,or beside a large water body facing the warm rays of sunset, might seem like the simplest  rather most surreal thing on earth. Because how Dare you say no infront of the camera when you’re  a celebrity in the village?
How could you say no yet these are pictures that are going to flaunt social media walls and you have haters to prove wrong?
In your heart,always linger a statement  or a word of negation that you can’t  just pronounce there.
Well I said yes the other day because I saw a ring,  in a time that I didn’t  expect it would come my way. But given a chance that evening,  I would have said a big no.
‘If only,  if only….’,  is the faintest song that has stuck in my heart ever since  I said yes to him.
‘I wish I knew..’,  and all songs related to regrets have resounded in my mind.

I’m I so desperate to settle  for any man that comes my way?.
Well maybe,  because I’m not any contented in my relationship.
I am not happy in one way or the other,  the person who claims to love me is not  even proud of me. He wants everyone to believe that he’s just a friend when we go for any social excursion. He  wants to assume that valentine’s  day is just but an ordinary  day,  and that those who commemorate it are yet to mature. He doesn’t want  to tag me along where his friends are, 
He hides me like his dirty handkerchief in public . In my late 20s,  I seemingly don’t have the time to  go on mingling with guys around,  and  I decide that whoever comes my way,I would pick that one up and see if things would work out. Well yes,  all my affinities  are great people,  but knowing people,  and trying to get close to them are two different  types of ball games.
Consenting  to settle with a guy that you don’t love,  might be the greatest of depressions that I did encounter after he proposed to me.
The dreams we have about who we want for our life partners might be too much, we might be extra, the men we build up in our minds might be ones who we would  need to look for Clay and mould  for ourselves or choose to die in singlehood, instead of settling with whoever  will come our ways.
I was all tied up with wrong ideologies about love patterns.
That because I have dated him for 5 years,  then he definitely  is the one.That because I have talked to my mum about him,  then I can’t walk out of him. They also said that his friends and my friends know that we’re  dating and so we have to play the cards along. But all they said prolly didn’t  work out.
They were all hell-bent about making me live in what they believed in, and so I got myself in all this mess.
Little did I know that love still  comes with the 100 paged novel bought in the streets during my birthday.
All that happened with the guys I liked is what trashed my heart.
The doctor had his fiancè drive him into a wedding  ceremony that I was attending in  Kitale and he made sure to signal me and introduced his girlfriend. I was in charge of seat arrangement that day,  and I allocated them back seats.
The assistant  Banker at stanbic bank called me yesterday  night to invite me to a birthday party around his estate,  he should have told me that his girl was turning 25 and that they were celebrating their 3rd anniversary.  Shame!
The assistant  manager at Simba cement is  my friend too,  a very close one,  who chats with me till past midnight,  planning for coffee dates,  and asking me which novels are new in the market,  so that he can send them to me, and I’m still blinded.

Yesterday  morning,  I went to work feeling so low. You know those days that you wake up and feel like things are not just going to be OK in the course of the day?
Well yes,  the feeling domineered in my mind the whole mid-morning.
I really wished  someone could send a bunch of flowers,  or just a solitary bar of chocolates. The receptionist  called me just before lunch,  and in that huge bunch of yellow, roses,  Sam had tucked in a note that read ” I hope this brightens your day. You’re a true friend, that I don’t want to ever lose. ‘ (friend zone too tight to walk out of).

How did you all meet love?
This might be the last one I am vowing to commit to by the way.
It hasn’t  been easy in any way.
But atleast love came when I wasn’t looking again.
Love caught up with me when I least expected  it.
God also speaks about time in the Bible and  He says  that :”When the time is right,  I the Lord will make it happen! “.
So atleast  we might fail to question the occurrences when we stumble upon  a very fine man in a simple  birthday party of a kid turning three,  whose party everyone might not deem important,   like  this guy  and I thought would make the kid excited, appreciated and valued.
What killed love at the very first instance is that some of us felt inferior  at the very fast “hi”.
I believe that all of us are great,  and a simple profile of  someone shouldn’t really intimidate us when God is trying to bring someone along our way.
You’re  always there, venting,  ‘he’s  too good for me, maybe he needs ladies of his class’.
I however heard that guys use this line to break up with ladies,  and now you have to occasionally  wonder where did your goodness come in yet you’re the meanest creature who ever lived.

SDA men are not bad after all, especially if you are lucky to meet them on a Friday evening,  meaning the next day is a Sabbath. They are always yoked in holy Armour,  and what runs  in their mind,  is which song are they going to sing during the vespers  that evening as they welcome the holy day. Well they also think of family life  lessons that they have been taught in church during Sabbath  afternoons, throughout  their 10 years stay in the youth class with no particular  aim of chucking the class as they conclude the session with the hymn ‘love at home’. They also hope that they are going to meet a good lady  in church the following morning,and so if you appear to say hi to them that evening,  then you never know,  you might have just landed a soul who might give you a title in church in the years to come.
(Bibi ya Elder).
So what you’re both going to talk about that evening  is where each of you will spend time worshipping.
He might as well invite you to his church the following day   and so that means that soya will be served that evening  after  the party (that’s,  if you’re  willing of course )

God listens to prayer,  and leads your heart where it wants  to be,  or who it wants to be with.
I met an SDA man just again,  and yes,  I forgot to mention that my date during my engagement  party wasn’t  one of my heart choices.

We both cannot fathom how everything  went on fast,  but what I can say is that our love now is on the other side of low.
This one is way different, and I go to church with him often.
He really is not into suits as such and can go to church without a coat on. He doesn’t put on navy blue suits,  with a half coat in,  and a polka dotted pocket square.
He doesn’t attend youth meetings till late,  with a bid to discuss how messy it is dating none believers.
Being in an SDA relationship therefore;
You automatically  have to prepare yourself psychologically to convert into Adventism if an SDA man melts your heart. If you decide that you’re  just going to date,  and later on everyone will go to their churches,  then that man is lying to you big time,  and he’s wasting your precious time.
If you’re an SDA girl dating an SDA man,  kindly make sure that both of you are in choir, ( even if you don’t know how to sing,  just try learn) so it doesn’t occur that now the Son of Homabay is singing in a crusade  in Mombasa for two weeks, and you’re in Sofia SDa church leading Sabbath schools every cold morning. .
Also,  be ready to go for missions in Kakuma,  and volunteer to preach the word and win souls.

Be around the South Nyanza guy almost every Friday evenings to prepare  chappatis and you all know what, because the more he goes to church every Saturday without someone besides him,  the more likely  he is to meet a natural hair ambassador  of kisii land.

Make sure your social media handle pages, are active. From WhatsApp  to Instagram to Facebook.These guys know each other.  Funny how someone in Rongo Central sda church,  knows all members of a choir in Arusha Sda church. Announce that you’re dating him,  tag him in all posts,  post him on his birthday and, quote in Facebook” in a relationship  with so and so” .Mark your boundaries!

March with him in all weddings,  and make sure that his suit marches with your dress,  even if the bride didn’t  choose the design that fascinated you. Because if you don’t go for that wedding,  they will call the best photographer  around,  who will take killer photos, and now everyone will be thinking  that he is seeing the other one.
And all in all,  know how to brew soya, boil and make sossi soya chunks, style and gel your natural hair,  know all the stores  that sell skater skirts in the city or village that you are,  and check YouTube daily for sda choir tutorials, and couple goals hymnal singing,  because love wins with these guys as well.
It’s not always bad after all

Will you marry me?

So, yesterday I got engaged. My engagement venue was of course in the sub-urbs, right across a busy slum. Well of course many are the times, when guys who will not engage you in a private beach, (Don’t know if they are affordable as such though), but that’s not our business for the day. So back to these very men, who vent so much about proposing to ladies, in the most expensive of the hotels, I don’t know how you convince girls, that love is love, but as for me and my house, we are rolling it big. Back to my fiancé. He is a nonchalant guy, well at least not for the unconcerned side, but for the calm part. He is someone I really know nothing about, save for the fact that he hates reading novels, and he sometimes misses going to church. Calling for? Conflicting interests? You damn got it right. I am mad over books. I go to church every five hours on Friday and twelve hours on Saturday. But of course! I have chosen to settle with this one. OH well, he doesn’t love adventure too, and toasts wine to small wins. Just before our engagement, he told me he would really love to delve into tech,and maybe grow into one of the most renown of the tech-savvy. You know, I outrightly gave him that look, of “Well, at least you chose to walk your path with someone who is completely out of your world”. I am saying YES today, and getting a ring on my finger, so I can at least have a jewellery on, because I literally doesn’t even know how it feels like having one.Well am saying yes today,because all along, I knew and thought that I would never find a passion fruit seed in a perfectly well blended glass of juice,and I am finally saying yes, because my fiancé is a teacher,and we will be leaving that house early in the morning, to go laugh,cry and hug our students, then come baack to the house and plan our classes for the next day.